Olivia's Birth Story

seeing how Olivia is 4 months now, i thought i would put her story out there now haha. just so i don't forget it!! which i am sure i won't, because how could you forget the first time you are "extracting" the "guest" out of your womb?!

so this story is going to go back to about 2 weeks before Olivia was born. at the time i was working at Deseret Book in the Distribution Center, seriously one of the coolest jobs that i have been able to have before. it was a night where we all had to come in and do inventory. for those who don't know what that it is, let's just say it sucks. it's just lots of counting and sometimes re-counting. that night i started to experience some early contracting and i didn't think much of it because i really didn't know what i was looking for. but everyone was very worried for me and i couldn't see why, they were all very nice tho. i was able to leave a little bit early that night and go get some rest. for the next few days i would experience the same Braxton hicks. not enjoyable but bearable. i went to the doctor Thursday October 23, 2014 for my weekly check-up (the day before my due date) and i was hoping for some news that she had dropped? i was dilated? or anything! and nothing. just that i was thinning out. those past few days felt like they were for NOTHING! so we went home and i felt super bummed and tired and of course a whole lotta things. because that's just what you do when you are pregnant. you feel everything. deeply! that weekend was my last day of work (i worked my whole pregnancy! that is something that i am actually pretty proud of. so i thought i should put that right here.) and i tried to stay active. went to the mall. a home trade show. movies. car rides. walks around the neighborhood. anything.
sunday night as we were having dinner at my parents house it hit me. and it hit me hard and long. as we were saying prayer i just remember crying during the whole prayer and it felt like it was forever. my dad looked up after saying the prayer and saw that my head was still down and that i was holding my breath whimpering. but of course my loving dad said what's her problem haha. and i looked at him with the "infamous death" glare we call in my family. and then he freaked out and was like oh no, yadda yadda. and that began the timing. i felt so awkward. like they were waiting for this huge pregnant girl to either just pop this baby out right then and there or do like a summersault. either way i felt like a circus animal with my crowd. my brother could have cared less haha. which i actually liked. but there we were in my parents living room watching me do stretches with jeff and the many weird pain faces that i could come up with. i'm sure there are a few. all of this went down before 6pm sunday night. my mom kept insisting that maybe i should go in seeing how i was past my "due date" (in Pocatello they told me the 24th but here in Boise they told me the 27th, so i say i had 2 due dates. i wanted the 24th to be the right one.) i brushed her off. they had this app out though that would track everything, which i guess was nice looking back at it. but at the time i thought it was pathetic. but i guess i could see why they used it, they were a little excited. how jeff gets excited is much more different than normal people. he seriously is one of the most chill people i know. so when i could tell he was getting to that point. it was neat. i was watching my husband turn into a father. this whole time he really was never able to feel the magnitude of everything that i was experiencing the past 9 months. it was almost as if a lightbulb was about to go off. ding! you're going to be a dad! he was cute.
around midnight i was finished with them being all weird around me and got ready for bed. except this night i made sure my bag was ready. hmmm. interesting. took my shower, which i had to do EVERY night. so many times i would try not too because i would be so tired but i would end up waking up and going to take a shower. i slept pretty "well" that night with the occasional potty run in the middle of the night. you get to a point where you basically do it in your sleep. because you forget how many times you go. this time at 7:00am i made the hourly walk to the bathroom and this time my mucus plug had come out. it was weird. and i will leave it at that. i told jeffery and asked him what to do. while being pregnant i found out i was strep b positive. it's pretty normal too. but when your water breaks or plug comes out that you need to go to the hospital quickly so that no diseases and infections get to the baby. we called the hospital to let them know what was going on. i expected a call saying oh you're fine. or wait a little bit longer and see what happens. but i guess they didn't have a whole lot going on that day. so they told me to just come on over anyway. so of course i took my time. showered. i had no idea when the next time i was going to be able to! makeup. hair. the works. i mean i gotta look good for this mucus covered alien baby thing, am i right?!
now it's a little bit before 9:00am and we are out the door and on our way to the hospital. but i had to stop to get my "going guava" smoothie. one of the many cravings. i had like maybe a sip. i wish i could remember the exact feelings that were going on. i think i was more nonchalant. i again wasn't expecting anything. just a turn around and come back when i was into a deeper labor.
went to the room that was covered with 90's sage green wallpaper and weird little baby bum paintings. there i got dressed. more like stripped down into this "hole-y" gown. and waited. and waited. then a nurse came in and did her thing to check how far i was along. annnnnnnddddddd....i was a small one. what? barley a one? i was getting frustrated with myself. the nurse said she was going to make some phone calls. so we waited. and waited. andddd waited. we are going to have you stay she said. uhhhhh wait. what? that's when it all hit me. i wasn't going to be leaving this room until i was having a baby. that was one of the scariest feelings of my life! i was about to endure the most intense pain for this baby that i had never met. but i loved her so i was ready to do it. or it could've been that i was done with being this waddling whale. it was one of those!
i called my mom and let her know what the nurse had said and she drove over within the hour to be with me and jeff. they had to hook me up to all of the machines and monitors and IV's. my goodness there is so much crap that you have to be constricted to. yet they want you to stay active and walk around. yea right. if you know me you know that i hate needles, they scare the crap out of me. also you would know that i basically have no veins. anyone that has to take my blood or stab me with a needle can never find the vein the first time. on a good day 3 is good. but the nurse had to try 6 times. to say i wanted to strangle her would be an understatement. she searched and searched. i think it got to the point that she seriously couldn't find anything so she just went for it. first the right side of the inside of arm. nothing. so tried again and popped a vein. (by the way i am only telling you this part so you can feel bad for me. welcome to my pity party) so she went to the left side and tried the top of hand. nothing. then again with inside of my elbow but on the left side. finally she decided the 5th time with inside of left wrist. failed. and then did another spot and popped it right in. holy heck that hurt!! later on i would find out that was the worst place ever.

after the IV i had to have penicillin put into my system because of the strep b. within 15 min my whole left arm was on fire! like it hurt worst than the contractions that i was having at the time and then some. i get really embarrassed when i ask for help or show that i am in pain in front of people that i don't know. so i tried really hard to just let it happen, and i thought it was normal. once the nurse left. i broke down bawling haha. jeff then called back the nurse to have them fix it. he is allergic to the medicine so i think he felt bad for me, haha which is rare. i complain a lot. what they ended up having to do was was dilute it to the umth degree. so basilly it would drop every other second. it stung sooooo bad. i had to have a new bag every four hours. and with new nurses shifts i had to go through the same pain all over again. they didn't believe me that it burnt. no one ever does haha.
now i have been at the hospital a good while, maybe after 2:00pm and they could see with the contractions that Olivia's heart rate would start to decrease during my harder contractions. no one told me, i think they didn't want to scare me. which is good because it probably would have. also at that time they checked me and i was a small two. this was going to be the longest labor everrrrrrr!
fast forward to that evening i had to get up and go to the bathroom. did my thing and i came back but i wanted to stand because i had been in bed almost the whole time. i was talking to my mom, jeff and the nurse casually, and then i felt something. i was sooooooo embarrassed! i told them to not look at me! i was peeing in front of them and i couldn't stop it. i was laughing, something i do to hide my complete red face. and the nurse said actually that was just my water breaking. oh. it was the weirdest feeling. like you try to stop it, but you can't! from that time on i layed in bed with someone having to change my bed pad on a regular basis. labor is so glamorous. my family decided that they wanted to come in and see how i was doing. i was withering in pain. that is how i was doing. they tried to small talk with me but i wasn't having it. the contractions were getting more intense and quicker. jeff stood by the monitor.
somewhere in the day the anesthesiologist came and talked to me about the whole procedure that i was debating on having. i am a chicken when it comes to pain. so i knew that i was probably going to have to end up needing the epidural. but my mom had all four of us naturally. i wanted to compete with her. stupidest thing in the WORLD! if you're going to use the epidural do it! don't be brave. you're already being brave by pushing your baby out and then being a parent for the rest of your life! so do the medicine early if you can, if you have made the decision too. after the rest of my family left is when the contractions started to really have a hard kick to them and i was wanting to quit. but i was way to scared to use the anesthesiologist!! i remember they got to be so consistent that they all felt like one long contraction. my nurse, who was awesome, was my voice of reason and told me that since i still wasn't progressing and only going through pain that i just needed that epidural. i was in for a long labor she said. it had already been over 24 hours. i needed some rest if i was expecting to push out this 9 something pound baby. i cried with jeffery and my mom. we said a quick prayer to help comfort me with the pain. the nurse called the anesthesiologist and within 10 mins he was in my room prepping. i had asked not to see anything!! i held the nurses hand in one and jeffs in other while my face was buried into a pillow. he rubbed this stuff on my back and applied the tape. then boom he stuck the needle in. it seriously felt like a baby bee sting! that was it?! i felt like an idiot. all of that being scared and crying for nothing. he cleaned everything up and laid me down in my bed. the nurse and him were hooking everything up and watching the monitors. he then asked if i started to feel cold. i hadn't yet i told him and then bam! it was instantaneous. i gave him a thumbs up and a thanks dude. and he was on his way. from there the nurse got to place the oh so wonderful catheter. uhm weird. but now i didn't have to get up to go pee. just now everyone could see that i peed in this bag hidden under the bed. lovely. my mom, jeff and i were finally ready to sleep.
tuesday i slept like all day and didn't feel anything. it was amazing! a new nurse came in and introduced herself to me and then went to check me. i was at 6. that was it? all night there was only like a 1.5 difference? that was around 6:00am. so began another long day.
yadda yadda the day goes on. i don't feel barely any contractions. i sleep a lot. slow progression. and yup, more penicillin. then they switch to the nurse that i had the night before, thank goodness! she is awesome! she checks and i am now somewhere along an 8 or 9. hallelujah!! i was starting to feel the pressures again from the contractions and i ended up getting an oxygen mask because of my asthma. we were worried that i was going to have an attack while pushing.
ok, i kid you not. you know how they say when you feel like you need to push you just know. and that it feels like you just have to poop like really bad. it's exactly JUST like that. i thought it was an exaggeration or comparison. nope. it's the real deal. i told my nurse that i really needed to push and that i was ready. she checked and said yup. you're ready! she called my doctor, who i really didn't care for at all. i told her i didn't want her and that i would take anyone else. turns out my dr was already there. how convenient for me. i had started pushing with my nurse and it felt so good to push. i was expecting it to hurt a lot worse. the contractions are way worse than the actual giving birth part i would say. i only had to push for a little over an hour. my doctor came in and was prepared to either shut it down and call for a c-section or break my daughters shoulder. my doctor was a crazy lady. who tells a new soon to be mother that your child will be probably be too big and that we will have to either do a C-section or break her shoulder. i know what you're thinking, but shes the doctor! well i am the patient. and the doctor should advise and believe in her too. but boy did i prove her wrong. before she came in the nurse said that olivia was almost there. just a few more pushes! in just a matter of moments i was going to meet this girl that i already loved so much. she would be covered in everything disgusting and yet all i would end up wanting to do is hold her and kiss her. it was almost as if olivia had heard the conversation. when the doctor was in there, she was there for maybe 30 min from start to finish. she was down there, ya know doing her thing. and what olivia had done was pushed one of her shoulders out first and then twisted her head to allow the other shoulder to pop out. and from there it was just amazing. there she was. my daughter. at 9:16pm on october 28, 2014 i had my baby girl who i had been walking/waddling around with for the last 9 months.

something was wrong tho. she wasn't crying. they laid her on my chest and wiped her off. and they were doing everything to get her to cry. after a couple of minutes they had to end up taking her away from me to work on her. jeff left my side. having your baby is the weirdest feeling physically you will ever experience. but having your baby whisked away within a matter of minutes is scary. they become you're shield. they are apart of you. literally. and now they are gone. i knew she was in good hands obviously. but in that moment you really get to let everything sink in. i just had a baby? after 9 long months it's over? now what? where is she?
i was able to hold her one last time for a second before she was sent up to the nicu for more care. i felt like a horrible mom already. i know i wasn't. but someone else was having to take care of her. my family of three was gone for what felt like forever. but luckily my other family stayed and kept me company. i was exhausted and yet ready for the next task. jeff came back about 30 min later and reported what was going on. it was all medical language and i had no idea what he was saying. i just wanted to see her. my family left. but i asked my mom to stay. the epidural was finally wearing off to the point that i could leave my room to go to the recovery room. but before i could do that. there were two things i needed to. first get the tape and needle out of my back. and pee. so you thought having a baby hurt. no removing the tape of your back. that hurts!!!! i cried. a lot. and i screamed. i didn't scream a lot when i was pushing. but that tape. it will do that to you. and for some strange reason my skin doesn't react to that stuff very well because the adhesive stays there for days. no matter how hard you try scrubbing there will always be residue. my back would stick to my gown and my hair. not fun.

another thing girls should know when you are having a baby. all sense of modesty or self decency is out the window. you can try. but just know that you are pushing a baby out and everyone will be looking. you think you may be covered but really you're not. when you go to the bathroom you need help the first time. gross but it's true. the hospital gives you this kit to help you keep clean and relieve some of the achiness from down under. bless jeffery's heart. he is a trooper. i will leave it at that. in fear that i may embarrass him or something.
once i had made my way to our new room i was able to go upstairs and see her. jeff wheeled me up to the nicu. in the very back corner with a wall of windows laid my baby girl hooked up to all sorts of machines and under a heater. it broke my heart to see her there by herself without anyone there to cuddle her kiss her. but i had to remind myself that she was there to get stronger and healthier. a lot of babies there were in a much more severe condition. some being in incubators. that was always hard to walk past too. here i was with a somewhat healthy baby at the time and all these others had a battle to fight. we prayed for them and their mothers.

seeing olivia for the first time really was something else. i made a baby. that is just so bizarre to me. i still look at her that way sometimes. my first thoughts were my goodness you're tiny! and then holy cow you're huge! her newborn diaper that they had put on her was giving it's all for sure. she was very swollen and her head was totally cone head like. that was something i noticed right after she was born. i mean she was beautiful but right after they look like an alien. she was a cute baby alien tho. her skin was very nice shade of red. not like lobster, but a healthy plump looking red. she had some hair. not as much as i was hoping haha. but there was some. and she had the prettiest face. i know i am biased but really she was and still is a beautiful baby. even with all the tubes in her nose and chest. since i wasn't able to nurse her right away she had to have an IV in her hand. that made me the saddest. especially seeing how i just had a traumatic experience with mine. i held her hand and she held mine and i cried a little. we both had just overcome something together and now we were recovering. i wasn't able to stay with her for very long because the nurses wanted me to go back downstairs to get some sleep. jeff and i said a prayer and he gave her a blessing. we left her with a kiss and left for the night. the next two days in the hospital were going to be some of the longest, most annoying and exciting days.

the nicu dr from upstairs came to our room at like 6:00am to ask how i was and reported on olivia. there i was able to understand what exactly was going. olivia had swallowed some of the fluid when she was born and because she was over 8 lbs -weighing in at 9.8 oz it is also procedure to keep bbes in the nicu. babies who are larger are checked for diabetes and to watch their glucose levels. my whole pregnancy i didn't have diabetes and had great blood pressure. my OB thought that was so strange because of how big we both were getting. i gained a lot of weight tho my word! and they also were checking olivia's culture (whatever the heck that is. i never understood) and her oxygen levels were poor. that was a fear of mine seeing how i have asthma. but other than that they said my baby was doing great and that they just wanted to help her along the way so she could be 100% by the time we took her home. those next few days consisted of little rest, semi good hospital food, every two hours of olivia time to nurse and be with her, and some family visits.

jeff and i were able to take her home october 31, 2014 (aka halloween!!) from the hospital. that means we were there 5 days!!!! we were soooo done. i hated being bugged by the nurses and constant checks, and having to be in the nicu was tough. every day though she was able to get stronger and stronger. one by one a new tube or cord was removed and finally placed into a crib. thursday we were discharged and had to stay our last night in a nicu room. but that meant she was able to stay the night with us. our very first night as a family. it sounds exciting but it was filled with a lot of anxiety. no one was there to help us now. this baby who was just hours ago hooked to machines was put into our care and we had no idea what we were doing! but we survived somehow. all night one of us was up. i don't think we needed to be. it just happened that way. i was nervous that she was going to stop breathing and drown in her spit up. and jeff was just nervous i am sure. in the nicu i was able to nurse her pretty well but when i wasn't there that meant they were feeding her formula. that night when i was trying to nurse her i felt horrible and couldn't figure out what i was doing wrong. now i know. she had become dependent on the bottle. to this day she is still like that. i wish i could be the one she always needed but it hasn't worked out like that. i should consider myself lucky tho that i do get to at least nurse her in the mornings. nursing has been a battle for me.

in the morning we were so anxious to get out of there. we showered, packed everything up and were set. the doctor came and checked on us, the photographer took some darling pictures and then finally around noon we were discharged! mixed emotions tho. happy to leave and be out of the hospital. yet freaking scared out of my mind that she was ours for the taking. seeing how it was halloween it was kind of a busy night. trick-or-treaters almost all night. but she didn't freak out once. i wonder if all the beeping and crying babies in the nicu caused her to be chill with lots of noise. we had a family friend stop by with two of their kids and that was fun for us to see him. he says that he is the reason that we are together. idk about that, but i think what he may be haha. it was cool to have my whole family there, except for my brother preston who is serving his mission, and my new little family. that day is kind of a blur but i know it was good one.

 

jeff and i love this little one of ours with all of heart. we hope the best for her and we also hope that we are doing a good job. we both have great examples of parents. if we can be at least half of what they are to us. i think she will be in good hands. and heck, she is still here. so that means something is working in our favor! thank you jeffery for being apart of this journey with me. there is no one else that i would rather share this with. you're an amazing father and husband. remember that. and that i love you & olivia (aka poopy head)

thanks again chantel for the pictures!! i love them